Being Patient in an Impatient World

A long time ago, I wrote a blog post about 1 Corinthians 13, and talked about the qualities of love.  The past few weeks, one of those qualities have stood out to me more than any other, and that quality is patience. 

When we look at the way in which the Greeks wrote, there was generally a hierarchy in their lists.  The back end of a list was not always important, but the first words were always the most important.  This is crucial to understanding the verse, because Paul is essentially saying that patience is one thing that you must exhibit when you love someone.

If the person were to start saying, “I am patient, I am kind, I do not envy…”, conviction comes on quick.  Most people cannot get past “patient” before they start to realize that this does not ring true.  This is not necessarily bad, it is just that the Holy Spirit is reminding the individual of a growth area.  Ultimately, this is good because if we do not know where we need to grow we will never grow.

As I am mulling over the idea of patience, I think of a few different things.  The first is that I want a grateful attitude.  I want to be able to walk through life being content with what I have and not always wanting things that I do not have.  I also do not want to be the person that throws a fit when they do not get the object of their desire right when they want it.

This is why going forward I am committing even more to be patient with life’s circumstances.  I do many of these already, but it is good to have a written reminder.  So here is a short list of things that I am going to do through my thirties:

Instead of complaining about having a low paying job or a job that does not challenge me, I am going to thank God for the income that I do have and ask him for the patience to get through these times and learn to appreciate these times when I am well off financially.

Instead of demanding God to give me a job, I am going to ask him for the patience to wait on the right positions and the resources to get through until then.

Instead of being mad that someone treated me unfairly, I am going to ask for the grace to deal with them lovingly while communicating effectively to compromise.

Instead of trying to get people to conform to my lifestyle, I will ask God for understanding with them and for opportunities to grow with them.

Instead of taking the first opportunities that comes along, I am going to weigh my options and ask for God’s guidance.

Instead of being cranky about being a single guy, I am going to enjoy my life and friendships.

Instead of demanding people to move on my time table, I am going to respect their wishes and be patient with them.

Instead of complaining about my medical problems, I am going to thank God that I am able to do as much as I can with them.

Instead of letting others rush my decisions, I am going to remember that those who rush usually have selfish motives.

Instead of getting mad at getting caught in traffic, I am going to remember that someone probably got hurt ahead of me in an accident.

Instead of wanting a brand new car like people tell me to get, I am going to be grateful that my car is in really good shape for its age and has held up very well.

Instead of rushing through my counseling degree and my PhD (when I get there) and accruing more stress and debt, I am going to take my time with it and repair my finances.

Instead of impulse buying because I want something, I am going to wait for it to go on sale.

Instead of hurrying through life, I am going to take the time to enjoy the little things.

Instead of being too busy and impatient with life, I am going to make time for friends every week.

One my favorite verses is “from the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.”  I say it ad nausea, but it is so true! If we are impatient people, it will show in our words.  If Paul wrote patience as the first attribute of love, this is what I am going to set out to achieve, because I want to love better.  This is why I am doing my best to pray for a patient heart, so that my mind and my words will be patient.

I am writing today because I feel that if I am to be known by our love (1 John 4) as John wrote, then it is important that I am know for my patience.  I hope that you feel the same way, and that we will strive to become more patient and loving people that can bless others as God has blessed us!

People Talking

There is one thing that I have noticed about people, and that is that you can learn a lot about someone by the way in which they talk about other people.  Are they always cutting other people down?  Just don't be surprised when they do it to you because you are not an exception.  Do they talk about people from their past a lot and do not talk about recent friends?  If so, they are probably not the most social person and they could be dealing with hurts or a dry spell.  Are they talking about positive qualities that they see in people?  I hope so, and thats what I hope to do but I usually fall into the category of giving straight answers to straight questions and I do my best to be honest but not slandering.  I need to work on that.

I was talking to my friend Beth today and I think I gathered three or four ideas for blog posts (stay tuned!).  I was telling her about how when we talk positively about people, a few things happen.  One, you immediately want to become friends with this person.  Who wouldn't?  When you are really happy with someone and talk about them a lot, it is evident that the person must be of high character and you WANT to talk about your adventures with him or her. 

Secondly, you begin to feel like you know the person and you want to understand them better.  I find myself thinking, "I wonder how Beth's friend _____ is doing?" and I immediately want the best for them.

So now the question is, "AM I TALKING ABOUT GOD THIS WAY?"  I find that many Christians do not talk about their relationship with God.  In the business that I am in, I find that more people complain about what God doesn't do rather than what he does do.  I am guilty of that at times, again, I am working on that. 

I also find myself bugged when I talk about him, and all of my stories seem old.  That's when I realize that I need to get back to talking with him and get reconnected.  Not only does this keep me from living in the glory of the past, but it helps keep my relationship with God fresh and pursuing new horizons with him.

Most people think, "oh, well if I say that, then they will think I am some Bible-thumper!"  Well, if you tell people to get to know him because he will erase your problems or "make it all better", then yeah, it sounds like you drink the kool-aid.  Jesus is not ibuprofin, he is a little more than that!  Instead, what I learned to do is to talk about the changed lives that I have seen, the blessings that have been given, the love and compassion that was unwarrented, the encouragement given, or the peace that surpasses all understanding.  When you talk about God doing these things, whats there not to like?  Honestly, I would love to get to know a person who imbodies those qualities.

Too often it seems that people talk about Jesus as if they are the door to door salesman and he is a vacuum cleaner.  He does quite a bit more than that.  The fact is, if no one talks about what he really does, then no one will know.  We don't hear about the thousands of people getting saved in persecuted areas, instead we hear about "Christians" (if you want to call them that) blowing up abortion clinics.  We don't hear about the passionate church leaders that love the Lord and love others and are healing people mentally and spiritually, instead we hear about leaders falling from grace.

This week, my hope is that you can think about the amazing things that God is doing in your life and doing in the lives of others, and chat about it.  Use it as a means to encourage someone else, use it as a means to bring truth to a situation, use it to share love with someone else.  Let people know what your friend is doing in your life, because if you don't, then they won't get to know what he is doing in your life!  Plus, they might just get to know their friend a little better =)

The Law if Indispensability

For the past twenty four hours I have been mauling over a word that I honestly feel that the Lord has given me to share.  Well, there are lots of words that I feel that he gives me that I could share, but this one in particular really floored me because it empowered me and made me feel invincible.  Don’t worry, I am not going to test that =)

So the word that I got was this, “the law of indispensability.”  What does that mean, might you ask?  Well I am glad you asked!  Basically what it means is that if something is valuable or irreplaceable, someone will not dispose of it because it is needed to the point where something does not function properly without it.

So how does that relate to us?  Most of their days, people spend feeling as if they are a cog in the system… nothing less nothing more.  With the job market as it is, people feel disposable.  In relationships, many people are bracing for the day that they are dumped for someone else.  In families, people feel used and under appreciated.  Why is this?  Because people don’t realize that they are special so they do not feel special.

Now the question that I have to ask is, “what are you doing about it?”  “WHAT?  DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT?”  You might ask.  Yes.  Do something about it.  The fact of the matter is that much of the self-worth problems that people have are due to the fact that the individual is allowing what is happening to them to happen to them.  So what I am saying today is embrace the fact that you are special and actively live it out!

You might be thinking, “okay Jason, that’s great, but how?”  The cool thing about Jesus was that he made himself indispensible.  Yes, there were other miracle workers out there, but whose glory did they work for?  Their own.  Jesus focused on not just healing people, but forgiving them their sins and taught like no other teacher, which attracted most people (except some of the Pharisees).  How many other people do you read about that both claimed to be the Messiah and actually delivered?  None. 

He became indispensible because of his love, his passion, his commitment to his father, the commitment to truth, his commitment to the mission, and the commitment to those around him.  He cared about those around him, and he was different than the other Rabbis.  He did not suppress people with rules and heavy-handed behavior, instead he loved them… which was not always received well, but most of those close to him would die for him in the end.  He took a risk, stood out from the crowd, and met people’s needs, and he became irreplaceable.

So again, how do we become indispensible?  Here are some suggestions that I am pursuing and hopefully it will inspire you…

-Take on some roles at work that will bring a new dimension

-Take the time to honestly love someone and coach them through a tough time

-Become an expert in something important, and learn to love to share what you have learned.

-Take your hobby a step further and explore using your gifts and interests for something greater than staying in the four walls of your home.

-Stay late to help out

-Do an unexpected favor for a friend “just because”

-Honestly compliment someone on something that you admire about them

-Weaken a tense moment and bring clarity

-Send an encouraging handwritten note or email

-Share a word of wisdom from your past that could improve someone’s future

I want to challenge you to do one of the ten things I mentioned above.  Whether it is at work, at school, in a relationship, a friendship, or at church, these are things that people are not used to.  I found that many of them just take a little bit of effort, but they go a long way.

Imagine if we lived our lives as Christians as being indispensible?  The love of Christ would be infectious and erase the centuries of bad taste in people’s mouths.  I’ll admit, I have given Christians a bad name in the past.  But the cool thing is that just because I made a mistake in the past that does not stop me from impacting people in the future.  This is what we need to remember and why we need to seek Christ daily so that we can impact people in our world, not for our own glory, but for Gods.

My hope is that when you think about your life and say, “oh my gosh, when this (job, friendship, ministry, etc.) crashes and burns…” you can stop yourself.  Instead of thinking negatively, you will realize that you not only have value to God, but to others and you can honestly say, “No.  It won’t end bad… I am safe because I am indispensible.”

Knowing Your Enemy

Have you ever been upset about something and you are not sure why?  I had that feeling yesterday, and it really bothered me.  I mean, REALLY bothered me to the point that it was ruining my day.  But no worries, I will keep my personal stories to a minimum that way you will continue to read my post.  Plus, it gets better, so read on! =)

We had a meeting at one of my jobs today and my pastor (who is my boss) had a few different people on the leadership counsel talk life with us.  Two of the messages that were given really hit home with me.  The first one was talking about how we are often times in a state of unrest when we are not doing what we are called to do.  I was like, “Well, of course!”  I do believe that I am where God wants me to be right now, but it was not always that way and sometimes I wonder if I am not in the right place.  That was the first detail that struck a chord with me, it was a Captain Obvious statement for me, but one I needed to hear.

The second message that really hit home for me was when our Pastor mentioned the idea of knowing your enemy.  Being that my mind goes on side tangents, I was thinking, “okay, so this is how Satan operates.”  Then I dove a little deeper, and was thinking, “how does he operate against ME?”  Of course I was so focused on being frustrated about my migraine that I had and frustrated about other life life details that I forgot to actually try to think of the ways that he attacks me in particular.

So I got prayer after the session, and being that I had a massive headache, I was not exactly lucid and did not give intelligent answers when he asked me questions (Ironically, about the first point that hit home to me).  Having stress and headaches is not good and rarely equals good results!  So I walked away frustrated wishing that I had given good answers and no headache.  Back to work I go…

I get on the road (which I really enjoy), and I am talking to God in my empty car trying to make heads and tails out of what I just heard.  Then I thought, “what really bugs me?”  I started to cycle through my head, and remembered ignoring a friend’s judgmental remark that annoyed me.  It did not hurt me or offend me, but it was something that was not life giving and served no real purpose.  I ignored it because I did not want to give negativity any sort of root in my life.  Then it dawned on me, THAT was my enemy.

When we look at our lives, often times we get hit the hardest in the areas that we are strongest.  Since I score high on encouragement in spiritual gift assessments, Satan is aiming for my morale.  That is exactly what he was doing.  Whether it was my car being in the shop, losing my phone, a wounded person’s insensitive remark, listening to too much sarcasm, or being in a negative atmosphere too long, I realized that it was changing me for the worse.  So immediately, I began praying aloud and praying against it.

Did it get better right away?  Yes, for a bit.  But you better believe that trouble came back quickly.  Luke 11:24 says that when a impure spirit comes out of a person, it returns with seven more (paraphrased).  This is why it is important that we ask God to fill the spaces in our lives where evil once was, because evil will want to return to it’s former home.

So this is why we must first IDENTIFY what it is, and then OCCUPY it with the Holy Spirit.

This is why I asked God to occupy those spaces quickly and to help me make better choices about who and what I allow into my life.  Even if it may look innocent, it could have a very bad long term effect.

So to conclude the story, my drive home was refreshing because I had a better grasp of who my enemy was and how he operates.  The cool thing was that after I identified the tactics, I was able to see around him and see how he was trying to stop me from reaching my goals.  It does not always improve my circumstances, but it helps me gain understanding and see what it is that he is trying to roadblock me from getting to.  By the way, I was able to get a better grasp on what was on the other side of the roadblock and get some answers to my Pastor’s questions… but that will have to be a story for another day =)